Thursday, March 1, 2012

Ibintu 10 bigaragara nk’umwanzi w’urukundo mu Rwanda

Kugira ngo urukundo rwanyu rusagambe, ntabwo ukeneye gukora ibitangaza. Ahubwo hari ibintu bimwe na bimwe ugomba kwirinda bishobora kugukoma mu nkokora , vuba cyangwa se kera bigatuma wumva utagikundana n’umukunzi wawe. Ni ibintu bigaragara nkaho ari bito, ariko ugomba kwirindwa cyane.

1. Televiziyo

Televiziyo ni kimwe mu bintu byangiza urukundo (ku bazitunze). Hari igihe mujya ku meza ari nako muri kureba amakuru , mwarangiza mugahita mureba firime, ibyo bikarangira munaniwe muhita muryama ; nta mwanya mwabonye wo kuba mwaganira ngo buri umwe yite kuri mugenzi we. Igisubizo kuri iki kintu, ni ukugabanya igihe umara ureba televiziyo kugira ngo ubashe gushyikirana n’umukunzi wawe. Aho kugira ngo iki gikoresho kibasenyere, byibura mwakwemeranya kuyisimya inshuri 4 mu cyumweru, mukamenya amakuru mukoresheje ubundi buryo burimo radiyo.

2. Kurambirwa

Bitewe n’ ibintu bitandukanye musigaye muhugiyemo birimo na televiziyo twabonye haruguru, mwarambiwe gusohokera ahantu mwakundaga kujyana. Ntabwo mukijyana gutembera, ntabwo mukijya kureba ibitaramo nka mbere, ntabwo mukijya ha hantu mwakundaga gusohokera, ahubwo musigaye musohoka nka rimwe mu kwezi, nabwo mugiye gusura abantu b’ inshuti cyangwa se mubaherekeje igihe baje kubasura. Mugomba rero kugarura wa muco watumaga muba mwenyine mugaseka mugakina, mbese mukongera mukiyibutsa ibintu bya kera byabahuzaga.

3. Amasaha y’ ikirenga

Ugomba guhagarika kuva ku kazi igihe cyarenze. Uretse ko utanafite igihe cyo kwiyitaho nkawe ubwawe, uba unananiwe cyane ku buryo nta kintu wabasha, ibi rero bikaba bitagwa neza umufasha wawe. Kuri bamwe iyo akazi kagufata umwanya munini, usanga ari nacyo kiganiro usigaye ufite gusa ; ibi bigomba guhinduka. Ni byiza gukora akazi kawe n’imbaraga zawe ku buryo amasaha yako arangira nako karangiye, maze ugahaguruka ugataha.

Gerageza gutaha kare kugira ngo ugire igihe uba uri kumwe n’umukunzi mbere y’ uko amasaha yo gufungura agera. Aka gahe kandi ntugaharire ibindi, ahubwo sa nk’ uwikuye iby’ akazi mu mutwe maze wite kuri mugenzi wawe.

4. Kutiyitaho

Ntabwo kuba mwarashyingiranywe cyangwa se mubana bivuze ko ugomba guterera iyo. Hagarika guhora wambaye imyenda yo gukorana igihe cyose uri mu rugo, cyangwa se ngo ushyiremo imyenda ishaje, imisatsi uyireke idakoze, ngo ureke ibintu byawe byandagaye ahantu hose mu nzu. Iyiteho !. Nibyo koko umukunzi wawe agukunda uko uri, ariko se kuki utashyiramo umuhate kugira ngo umwereke ubundi bwiza bwawe atari azi ? cyangwa se ngo umwereke ko bwa bundi ntaho bwagiye ? iki gihe uba urashe inyoni ebyiri icya rimwe kuko, uba umweretse ko umuha agaciro igihe ahari kandi ukanamwereka ko ubwiza bwawe ntaho bwagiye.

5. Kumera nk’ aho mugenzi wawe adahari

Undi mwanzi w’ urukundo, ni ukumera nk’ aho mugenzi wawe adahari. Aha ntabwo bivuze kutamuha impano, ahubwo byonyine kumureba: Ukabona ko yavuye muri ‘salon’ gukora umusatsi we cyangwa se kwiyogoshesha, ukabona igihe yaguze amaherena mashya cyangwa se ikote rishya. Ntuzatindiganye kumubwira ko ubona ko yambaye neza, cyangwa se ko akeye igihe uri kubibona. Ugomba kandi kumwereka ko unyuzwe n’ akantu agukoreye, igihe agize icyo akora kikakunyura.

6. Gufuha by’ indengakamere

Hagarika kumugenzura cyangwa se kumubaza ibibazo byinshi uko umutima uteye, kuko ipfundo ry’ urukundo ni ukwizerana. Kubera guhora umukeka, ushobora gutuma umukunzi wawe yirekurira undi muntu.

7. Kwifata

Burya akabariro kagira uruhare runini mu mubano wa babiri. Ntabwo abashakanye babereyeho kwifata bihoraho. Mugomba guhora mufite udushya mu bijyanye n’ ubuzima bwanyu bw’ imibonano mpuzabitsina, mugahindura ahantu ndetse n’ uburyo (positions)… kugira ngo murusheho kuryoherwa n’ icyo gikorwa , mushobora kandi gufata amasomo musoma ibitabo, mureba amafilimi , muganira n’inzobera mu bijyanye n’imibonano mpuzabitsina niba mwese mubona ntacyo bibatwaye.

8. Umuryango uvukamo

Nibyo koko, ababyeyi b’ umwe baba bagomba kubana n’ undi nk’ aho ari umwana wabo, akabubaha akabaha agaciro bakwiye. Gusa ntuzigere umuhatira gukora icyo atumva neza, kuko bishobora kumurambira. Ntuzamubwire ko buri ku cyumweru mugomba kujya gusangira n’ ababyeyi bawe, ko hari icyo agomba kubagurira, kuko uko bigushimisha bishobora kuba ari ko bimurambira.

9. Kutagira imishinga

Gukundana cyangwa se gushinga urugo ntabwo bivuze kudatekereza ejo hazaza. Mugomba gufatanya, mugakora imishinga y’ igihe gito (kugura tumwe mu dukoresho mukeneye mu rugo, kugura inzu yo kubamo…) n’ imishinga minini (kubyara abana, gukora umushinga ubyara amafaranga …). Ntuzigere ureka gutekereza kuri ejo hazaza hanyu. Ibi bituma mufatanya gushaka icyo mwakora mwembi. Bitaba umukunzi wawe akabona ntacyo umaze agatangira kwishakira abandi bafite imishinga y’ejo hazaza.

10. Guceceka

Kutaganira ni umwanzi ukomeye w’ urukundo rwa babiri. Bitewe na bimwe mu byo twabonye haruguru, hari abahitamo guceceka. Ibi rero ngo bishobora kwangiza urukundo rwanyu, mugasigara mubanye nk’ abantu baziranye gusa. Ni byiza ko mugerageza gushaka ikintu muvugaho, gituma muganira n’ ubwo nta kintu kinini mwaba muri gutegura. Igihe ibi byanze, mushobora kwitabaza abaganga bo mu mutwe (thérapeute).

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